Husband needs to call a family meeting
Dear Amy: My wife and I have been married for 25 years. In most respects we continue to have a very solid relationship. We enjoy talking and doing things together, and we have a lot in common.
We have been semi-retired for 10 years. We spend a lot of time together.
If there is one challenge that never seems to resolve itself, however, it is my wife's claims that I have either not listened to her, or that I have misinterpreted something she says.
She stores away every instance of my "failures" in this area, so that each time I miss or forget something she has said, she becomes frustrated and upset.
These miscommunications usually involve minor issues relating to house maintenance, shopping and scheduling. This happens every few weeks.
In my view, considering how much time we spend together, these episodes are not serious enough to evoke her building frustration, which then spills over.
I have apologized often, but have also told her that I am human and am going to forget things on occasion or misinterpret what she says.
She invariably says that these situations are examples of a lack of respect for her.
I feel I am under a microscope and that she is growing intolerant to the point that it poses a threat to the marriage. She insists that there is no other underlying grievance involved.
I would like to try to improve things before recommending marriage counseling. Any advice?
...continued
