Widower wants ex-wife to be his caregiver
I just thought that it might prevent duplicate gifts, as well as gifts we will not use. But my cousin (with whom I am very close) told me that she finds gift registries very insulting, because they are just a "dressed-up form of begging." I certainly do not want to insult my guests by demanding certain gifts, but I have to admit that my life would be so much easier if I could ensure that I don't get 30 pacifiers and no bottles!
Should I still create a registry and direct my guests to it when I invite them to my shower? If so, how should I phrase this on my invitation so that I don't seem unappreciative of gifts that are not from the registry?
-- What to Expect
Dear What to Expect: Yes, create a registry. Registries for baby showers are a relatively new thing, but many new parents (and their guests) find that they are helpful, for all the reasons you cite.
To speak to your cousin's criticism -- basically the shower itself is "a dressed-up form of begging."
Don't include registry information on your invitation, but make sure whoever is hosting your shower has it and can readily pass it along to anyone who asks.
Dear Amy: You gave a compassionate response to "Concerned Daughter," whose elderly mother is driving when she shouldn't. A much easier solution would be for this daughter to take her mother's keys!
-- Easy-Peasy
Dear Easy: With my own mother, this process invoked the phrase, "You'll take these keys from my cold, dead hands." It's really not that easy-peasy.
Compassion is almost always the most difficult path.
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)
