Senior wants to go for the gold in his 'golden years'
The way through this marital challenge is to use the same techniques that have probably served you well during your very long marriage: listening, communication and compromise. You should not give up on your goal, but you also need to work with your wife to find new activities that you two can do together. Perhaps the week after your first race, you two could take a trip together. She chooses the destination and the itinerary, and you commit fully to her plan, while recovering from your completed race.
Dear Amy: My boyfriend's parents are nice people, but I don't know them very well. His mother made a comment to me that I can't shake. We were out to lunch one day and she made a joke that I would "make a great first wife." She said this in front of her husband, as well as my boyfriend.
I know she meant it as a joke but every time I am around her I worry that she thinks I am not good enough for her son. This makes me uncomfortable around her, and honestly I don't really like her because of it.
To me, jokes come from real feelings, but are masked in a way to avoid confrontation.
How do I address this with her without it being awkward or confrontational?
My boyfriend does not remember her saying it, but he has my back. If we move toward marriage, we will have to address it.
-- Trying to Move Forward
Dear Trying: You want to address this statement, but you don't want to risk any awkwardness yourself, and in that way, you are trying to take the easy way out.
But there is no easy way out.
You don't seem able to accept this as a very failed (and unfunny) "joke," and move on -- and so you will have to confront this, respectfully.
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