ArcaMax

My heart doesn't want to give up, but how much can you push to pursue the past?

Should I give up?

-- So Sad

Dear So Sad: It's a little hard to tell from your question, but I'm going to assume that whatever your husband did, he was at fault and the friendship was damaged as a result.

Their cordial contact with you is a sign that they don't want to erase their affiliation, but they might be waiting for something before they can commit to a renewed friendship.

Your idea that no one should apologize for anything is wrongheaded. You want for everyone to be "gracious." Well, you've got graciousness now. You won't have intimacy until your husband admits, apologizes, and at least attempts to clear the air.

Stop pushing to get together and work on your relationship from a distance.

Dear Amy: I'm responding to "Stressed in NY," a retiring couple wanting to move right after their son's graduation.

Your response was PERFECT. I can relate to how their son feels. Of course he's unhappy! In 1973, my parents moved our family from Tulsa to Boston three days after my high school graduation.

I sat at commencement hyperventilating, knowing I was going to be leaving everything I knew behind. I had to leave my childhood home, friends and extended family. I'm an only child, so the move was particularly rough.

I returned to Oklahoma to attend college, but I forever felt rootless and disjointed. I flew home for school breaks and holidays, but it wasn't "home."

Your advice to the parents was a wonderful solution to help their transitioning son accept the move.

-- Rooted Now

Dear Rooted: I felt for this family.

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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)