Parents wonder if drunk gran is fit babysitter
It sounds as if you have managed your response to your brother's abuse in a balanced way. If this current change in his status has shaken loose some worrying symptoms, you should definitely seek more professional help.
Dear Amy: I was in the same situation as "Baffled Bride," who had married a widower, and his adult children completely rejected her.
This happened to me! Both my husband and I lost our spouses. My children accepted him, but his children rejected me. They seemed to hold a perception that we were fighting for control of their father.
I guess I understand this, but I'll never understand my husband allowing it.
-- Sad
Dear Sad: This rejection seems fairly common. Acceptance definitely takes time, but it should not be presented as optional.
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Amy Dickinson, c/o Tribune Content Agency, 16650 Westgrove Drive, Suite 175, Addison, Texas, 75001. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)