Life Advice


Health & Spirit

Landlord has become way too handy toward tenant

By Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Understand that at the end of the day, you are not responsible for your husband's lack of friends. He really does need to make a choice to fully commit to you, and so far, he doesn't seem to have actually made it.

Dear Amy: A close family member, "Clara," concocted a completely false, salacious accusation about me, and -- unbeknownst to me -- spread it through the family.

This was about four years ago. Eventually, her own daughter bravely took me aside and told me about her mother's accusations.

Other family members corroborated that Clara had, indeed, spread rumors.

I'm really private and socially awkward. It took me a couple of years to get the nerve to bring it up, but when I did, Clara quickly deflected, telling me that the devil was filling my mind with lies and that I just needed to pray about it.

Clara never acknowledged that she was the source of the gossip.

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Clara is a sanctimonious church-goer and advertises herself to be a saintly senior citizen. She has never acknowledged the lies and gossip she spread, nor offered any apology.

I was blindsided. I was so humiliated that I wouldn't even go to the grocery store in my own town. I've worked through most of the hurt, but I have not forgotten.

I want to bring it up again, but I don't want to seem foolish or petty.

Is there any way to address this issue with her? Or should I let it go? The damage has been done and the gossip has been spread and I can't un-ring that bell, but I would still like to know what made her do that. I guess I'd like some kind of closure.


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