Teen girl worries about family's future
You've already expressed your opinion on this. You don't get to control where your husband has lunch or dinner when you're not with him. Understand that there are almost unlimited ways for your husband (or you) to objectify people -- actually or virtually (it doesn't take a trip to Hooters to see sexy women).
It sounds like it would be best for you if he simply didn't tell you about his annual excursion. You could say to him, "Patronize whatever restaurant you want, but please don't tell me about it."
Dear Amy: "Dad of a Transgender" wondered how to respond when someone who doesn't know he has a transgender son asks, "How are your girls?"
One way to reply is to say, "Linda is doing great. Jane goes by John now, and he's doing great, too!" and leave it at that. Most people will get the picture without needing an explanation.
As a gay man in the work force, I mentioned "my husband" and used the pronoun "he" when we all spoke of our home life. I "came out" to my co-workers without ever saying, "I'm gay," and nobody requested further details.
-- Getting the Message Across
Dear Getting the Message: Well done.
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Amy Dickinson, c/o Tribune Content Agency, 16650 Westgrove Drive, Suite 175, Addison, Texas, 75001. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)
