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Wronged wife stalks husband's former girlfriend

By Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: My wife and I have been together for eight years, but have been growing apart. Recently, I met a woman and started seeing her. The affair lasted for three months. My wife found out and was obviously hurt by it.

She said that she forgives me, and we both acknowledged our issues and wrong actions. We agreed to stay together and move forward.

My wife doesn't want me to have any contact with the other woman (which is reasonable), but she drove an hour and a half to confront the woman and ask her questions about our relationship -- at the woman's workplace. My wife even took a picture with the other woman to prove that she had visited her.

I was very upset about this. I have not had any contact with this other woman, respecting our agreement.

My wife has lied and tried to hide things from me in the past. At this point, neither of us can trust the other.

I do not think either of us is happy in our marriage. We have tried to have honest, open communication but when I talk she gets hurt and doesn't want to listen. When she talks at me for two hours straight, I am expected to sit through it and listen.

We have "discussions" almost daily. The most recent of these was at 4:30 a.m. because I fell asleep on the couch watching a football game and did not respond to her text (which I did not see).

A family member told me the other woman was not the answer, but he couldn't think of a single reason I should stay with my wife.

I'm confused about what to do next.

-- Unhappy Husband

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