ArcaMax

Dear Amy: My boyfriend has been living with my children and me for seven months. My kids are 5 and 8.

I was looking for a pen and saw two prescription bottles in the drawer of his nightstand. As a parent, I am concerned about all medications kept in my home. I was curious because if there's a slight chance my kids could get into this medication, I need to know what it is.

One is a well-known drug that is used to treat bipolar disorder and severe depression. He did tell me when we first started dating that he used to take a pill every now and then for insomnia (online I found out that the particular drug has been used off-label for it). The bottle was full and expired a year ago.

The other medication I found is also used off-label to treat severe depression. I looked up the doctor listed on the bottle and sure enough, it was a psychiatrist -- and the medication expired two years ago (the bottle was almost full).

He is a very private man. I knew early on that he has had issues with alcohol. He has only very recently acknowledged that he is a (sober) alcoholic.

His health is his business, but I've got kids. If he's got a mental illness, I feel I've got the right to know, especially if he's got a drawer full of mood stabilizers where my kids could potentially reach them.

Do I not tell him I invaded his privacy? Or, do I go into parent mode and say, "Hey, one, keep your stuff up high and two, if you've got health issues, as a mom, I have the right to know?

-- LW

Dear LW: You seem to be experiencing something of a crisis over two prescriptions that have not been used and are long-expired. So before you go bonkers over this, it would be best if you didn't describe it as "a drawer full of mood stabilizers."

Your boyfriend seems to have been honest, though circumspect. Certainly, his sobriety could have a profound positive impact on his mental health -- thus the unused medications. And please -- the fact that he saw a psychiatrist shows responsible adult behavior on his part.

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