Pavlov is enjoying a pint in the pub. The phone rings. He jumps up and shouts: "Oh heck, I forgot to feed the dog!"

What does a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac spend most of his time doing?
Staying up all night ...Read More

Feudalism: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.

Pure Socialism: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. The government gives you a glass of milk.

...Read More

The devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the range.

Three weeks later, a cow walked up to him carrying the Bible in its mouth. The cowboy couldn't believe his eyes. He took the precious...Read More

At the scale manufacturers' convention, people often wanted to weigh themselves on different scales to see if they agreed. However, some visitors abstained, not wishing to advertise their weight.

A smooth-talking ...Read More

Closure.

Closure who?

Closure mouth when you're eating!

- Your cow insists on wearing a little A-1 sauce behind each ear as cologne.

- She refuses to let you milk her, saying "Not on the first date."

- Your cow takes up painting and cuts off one of its ears.

- Your cow gets ...Read More