Things My Mother Taught Me
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Published in Jokes
My mother taught me to appreciate a job well done – if you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.
My mother taught me religion – you better pray that will come out of the carpet.
My mother taught me about time travel – if you don’t straighten up, i’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!
My mother taught me logic – because, i said so, that’s why.
My mother taught me more logic – if you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you’re not going to the store with me.
My mother taught me foresight – make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.
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