Business
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Your Office Wedding
Of all the advantages enjoyed by today's remote office worker, an exciting new benefit has emerged. You can now spend a lot more time at all the destination weddings you probably didn't want to attend in the first place.
Julie Weed, a reporter for the style section of The New York Times, schooled me on the subject in her recent article, "Type...Read more
The Instagram Office
What has a blueberry-muffin-blue conference room, a razzle-dazzle-red conference room and a maple-waffle-brown meeting room, all decorated with fake succulents in purple pots and vintage chairs upholstered in yellow pineapple-printed cloth?
No, it isn't the nightmare you get after drinking too many ayahuasca martinis with the marketing staff....Read more
Thank You for Your Thank You
Whether you're reading this before or after Thanksgiving, thank you.
(If you're reading this on Thanksgiving, please pass a drumstick.)
The importance of saying thank you in business cannot be over-stated. Unfortunately, when you make as many mistakes as thee and me, you don't get a lot of thank-yous, so it is completely understandable that ...Read more
If the Shoe Fits, Beware It
If you're looking for a discussion of the people running for president in the Republican primary, this is not the place to find it. If you are looking for an opinion on the shoes being worn by the people who are running for president in the Republican primary, pull up a footstool.
You've come to the right place.
"Why GOP Candidates are ...Read more
Swipe Right for the Perfect Job
It's frustrating!
The perfect job is out there. You just don't know how to find it.
On the positive side, you do know where to look.
It's the same place you went to find your perfect partner. And the perfect place to live. And the perfect outfit to wear in the perfect place to live with your perfect partner. (So, OK, the cargo pants were a ...Read more
Being Happy at Work Will Make You Miserable
Are you happy at work? Does a smile cross your face every time you skip through the front door? Do you trudge out that same door, eight hours later, counting the minutes before you can once again frolic with your co-workers?
No?
Well, listen: If you're unhappy, I'm unhappy. And so is your boss.
Like me, your manager has surely read "Creating ...Read more
Snoozing Your Way to Success
You're late.
I've been waiting, like forever, for you to read this week's column. And now you finally arrive, full of excuses. You were up half the night and overslept, and you were so tired this morning that you couldn't get your real work done. (As if reading this column wasn't real work.)
Whatever excuse you make, whatever reprimand you ...Read more
How CEOs Can Save the Office
(Warning: This column is for CEOs only.)
If you're a CEO, you're probably in a bad mood right now. And rightly so.
Your stockholders complain every time the price of your stock drops a measly 50% or 60% or 70%. Your employees complain simply because you're paid 400 times the salary of the average worker. Most annoying of all, no one will ...Read more
Plan to Be Spontaneous at Work
What's the best part of being a success?
You never have to chitchat.
As a VIP, concentrating on high-level issues, no one expects you to deal with idle chatter from the hoi polloi. It's a tradition as old as time. No one on the team would hazard a friendly, "How about this crazy weather?" to Svein Forkbeard, King of the Vikings, if they saw ...Read more
Is Your Company Playing the Name Game?
Blame it on the internet.
If it wasn't for the internet, we wouldn't have giant tech companies and their high-tech jargon seeping into our business lives, making everything we do, and everything we say about everything we do, totally unintelligible.
Consider "feedback."
Since Hector was a pup, giving and getting feedback has been integral ...Read more
Confessions of an Office Ten
Are you the best-looking person in your office? Let's find out. Do your coworkers make goo-goo eyes when they pass you in the hallway? Do new employees snuggle their trays next to yours in the company cafeteria, even when it's Meatloaf Monday? Do the IT people rush to fix computer problems when you report them, sometimes even in the same month? ...Read more
Racing Ahead in Your Career? Better Learn to Drag Your Feet.
What do you do when a new assignment comes around?
If you immediately raise your hand, you're making a big mistake. What you should do is duck your head. And if that new assignment does land in your lap, you certainly shouldn't put your nose to the grindstone and start working. What you should do is hold your nose, and start dragging your ...Read more
Shocker! Intelligence Comes to the HR Department
It's artificial intelligence to be sure, but let's be honest here. Putting even a smidgen of computer-generated brainpower in a part of your company famous for empty-headed decision making has to be an improvement.
Or does it?
It shouldn't be a surprise that HR has lagged in the technology adoption that has affected every other department in...Read more