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Part Of Our Friend Group Only Takes, Never Gives

Judith Martin, Nicholas Ivor Martin and Jacobina Martin on

GENTLE READER: Asking for help is far easier -- and will be more effective -- than making accusations. Tell the owners that you are horrified, but you believe you have been robbed and ask if they, or their employees, noticed anything suspicious.

There is no need to finger one of their employees as your primary suspect; they will be wondering the same thing. But by naming the crime, you make clear that you are not just asking if they have seen something you yourself misplaced.

Miss Manners warns you against undue optimism. Your conversation is unlikely to end either with the couple telling you that they found everything next to the dog's sleeping area and hadn't gotten around to telling you yet, or that they fired an employee they caught with another customer's television in her back seat and will be bringing your earrings over tomorrow.

It may end with them saying that they had another customer report items missing, which will provide you with information you can, if the issue cannot be solved more gently, take to the police.

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(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

COPYRIGHT 2021 JUDITH MARTIN

DISTRIBUTED BY ANDREWS MCMEEL SYNDICATION

COPYRIGHT 2021 JUDITH MARTIN
 

 

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