Ask Amy: Friendship is no ‘give’ and all ‘take’
Why is it up to her friends to bail her out? Weren't we kind enough?
– Feeling Unappreciated in Ohio
Dear Unappreciated: Some of “Chelsea’s” behaviors are typical of people running scams. Classic “tells” are befriending someone very quickly, establishing a transactional relationship, asking for favors and then cash – and increasing the pressure. (You should not have wired her money for food. If you believed she needed food, you could have given her groceries.)
I’m not saying that she is deliberately running a scam, but the effect is the same: You give, she takes, she asks for more and then she piles on the pressure.
I suggest that you cut ties with her, in-person and online. She’ll have to find another mark.
Dear Amy: I am a single man and live near my parents and siblings.
We're pretty close, except that we have very different beliefs and styles.
In our family, there is a constant stream of birthdays, holidays, family celebrations, etc.
My parents also have a lake house they purchased a decade ago, and they constantly invite me to stay there over weekends – even though I remind them each time that I work weekends.
In spring/summer, it seems like there are one or two family events per week, and I get burned out.
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