Ask Amy: Father’s funeral attendance is last straw
When she died, she left two young children behind.
Sometimes I feel like I do more for those two grandchildren than I do for the other three grandkids, and I feel guilty.
My son takes excellent care of his children, so I don't have to spend as much money or time with them as I do with the other ones.
Please let me know if I'm wrong for the way I feel.
Should I change now, before they recognize this imbalance, too?
– Guilty Gram
Dear Gram: I’m genuinely sorry for your loss. Your choice to step up for your grandchildren is natural – and commendable.
If your daughter passed away almost 10 years ago, then your grandchildren are already aware of any differential in your attention to them.
Sometimes guilt can be a guide, pointing toward changes you need to make.
But I’m a firm believer in young people’s ability to accept the universal truth that life isn’t necessarily fair.
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