ArcaMax

Dear Mixed: You seem averse to awkwardness, and yet – so much of wedding planning is awkward.

Understand that whenever you accept someone’s money (or advice), there is a likelihood that they will interpret this as you basically “partnering” with them. Decide if you really want to ask for or accept money from people who have extreme boundary issues, and are also completely disinterested.

Is his family interested in hosting a rehearsal dinner (a traditional role taken on by the groom’s family)? You could ask them if they’re interested in taking that on and hosting it.

Otherwise, invite them as guests, save seats for them in the front of the venue, include them in photographs, and respect the boundaries you’ve established with as neutral an attitude as you can manage.

Remember that you and your guy are a team, and stick with your therapy – it will help you through this highly charged time.

Dear Amy: With the holidays coming up, it is time for something I detest – GROUP HOLIDAY TEXTS!

I’d like to announce that if you are really serious about wishing ME a Happy/Merry/Whatever, please take just a few seconds to send something personal to me instead of grouping me together with everyone in your contacts list.

You get that initial text, then your phone continues to go off all day long with people you don't even know replying "You too," "Happy holidays to you and your family," "We need to get together soon!"

One day I got 46 responses from people and I have no idea who they are.

Am I the only one who feels this way?

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