Ask Amy: Retirees wrangle over the true cost of love
Lastly, my brother-in-law turns every conversation into a conversation about money.
My family doesn't live nearby, and we rarely get together.
This year, I want to be alone, go away alone, and play golf.
How do I propose this to my wife without causing hurt feelings?
– Bored in DC
Dear Bored: May I point out that the most “bored” people can sometimes also be boring people?
That having been said, if you don’t want to spend this holiday with your in-laws (whom you say you “love,” but don’t seem to like), you should bring this up without framing it as a criticism of your wife’s family.
Simply say to your wife that you would like to do something different this year, that you are desperate for some time on your own to regroup, and share your plan with her. She might be quite happy to commune with her family without you sighing your way through it.
The holiday break during the pandemic has caused many people to rethink how they want to spend their time.
Dear Amy: Regarding the question from “Anonymous,” about bragging grandparents who claim their grandchildren are geniuses … why not talk about the content of their character?
Start bragging about how they are thoughtful toward others. How they help their neighbors. How they are kind and considerate.
In other words, if you’re going to brag, brag about things that really matter.
– Jim
Dear Jim: Great advice.
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(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)
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