ArcaMax

– Fed up with Bad Bosses

Dear Fed Up: My first thought is that “building issues” are legitimate items to nitpick about. After all, maintaining buildings seems to be within the scope of your job. I also think that casting job-related nitpicking as “microaggressions” might not be appropriate (from your description, it’s hard to tell). “Microaggressions” are, strictly speaking, comments or actions directed toward a person from a marginalized group, such as a racial or ethnic minority. Maybe this applies to you – but nitpicking over work issues does not necessarily apply.

You had a dream supervisor who communicated well with you and obviously trusted you to perform well. This new person does not possess that valuable skill set and has not started off on a good footing with you.

While you are looking for a different position, you should at least attempt to communicate with your supervisor to review your job description, your duties, and their expectations – which seem different from your previous supervisor. Of course, your boss should initiate this conversation, versus trying to inspire you through negative feedback, but they have not done this.

I suggest that you make a concerted attempt to communicate with your supervisor before going to HR, because HR will most likely suggest this before taking action.

Take notes and document your concerns in writing, with dates and describing specific incidents and issues for your later meeting with HR.

Dear Amy: My husband has a good friend that he’s had since college.

I’ve now known him and his wife for over 20 years.

Over the years their drinking and fighting have increased. It’s nothing for her to drink two bottles of wine a night – and he’s not far behind.

A couple of years ago we went on a three-week vacation with them and the drinking and fighting were nonstop.

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