Ask Amy: Widower worries about dating again
What should I do?
– Just Friends
Dear Friends: When you essentially ask someone for permission to live your life within completely respectable boundaries, you take a risk that they will say, “No.”
And – reporting my own non-scientific findings and insight, I’d say that around 70 percent of adult children say a quick “no” to the prospect of their older parent dating after a loss. (They often come around later.)
Just as you don’t have the power to run your kids’ lives, you should not give them the power to run yours.
So, don’t ask.
For now, the only asking on your part should be confined to “Doreen.” Furthermore, I hope you won’t make the mistake of believing that you need to explain or apologize for a regrettable choice you made 40 years ago, which you and your wife dealt with as well as you could.
My overall point is that your health and happiness should be the most important thing to the people who love you. Handle this new relationship discreetly and in thoughtful stages.
Dear Amy: In January I loaned my granddaughter $9,000.
She agreed to pay me back when her bank opened the following Monday. I know she had the money because her father (my son) was involved in a lawsuit and she received a large sum of money.
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