Ask Amy: Sibling’s spousal diss shakes sister to the core
I was (and am) stunned. I sent a terse reply to both, saying, “I guess I wasn’t aware of how unwelcome Chas is at these gatherings.”
Shelly texted me: “I know that was super unkind and I hope you’ll forgive me.”
I have not responded. I have NOT breathed a word of this to Chas, who would be blindsided and deeply hurt. Shelly texted again: “[Brother] gets me going and words just come out. I miss you.”
I don’t even know if I want to fix this.
I have two siblings who share snide remarks about my partner behind my back!
Carrying this on my own is painful.
I need a LOT of time and space to get over this and am not confident I have the bandwidth to deal with it. Any thoughts?
Dear Blindsided: You are justified in feeling wounded and you did the right thing to call them out.
My thoughts are: Of course, siblings complain and gossip when they don’t think they’ll be caught!