Ask Amy: Parental termination is legal end to mothering
My husband and I have two children together, so my question is, would it be rude or wrong to talk and act as if I only have the two children?
I feel that would be easiest for me, as far as explaining, as well as healing and moving on in my life.
So, am I the mother of two, or three?
– Blank Slate Mom
Dear Mom: Termination of parental rights can only be done through a court, so I’m going to assume that this legal process is underway, and you are agreeing, cooperating, and participating in this extremely serious process.
Termination of parental rights happens most often after a parent abandons a child, which is what you did when you moved away and didn’t return to see your child.
I appreciate your candor that your son is much better off living full time with his father, but although you claim that you were not an “inadequate” mother to this child, you obviously were. I hope you have changed.
When you legally terminate your parental rights, you and your child are considered to be – quite literally – strangers.
You completely sever your relationship with the child opening up the possibility that he might be legally adopted by your ex’s partner (if he has one).
Legally, you now have two children instead of three, and that’s how you could describe your family when meeting people.
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