Ask Amy: Prospective mom worries about long-distance help
My ex and I still communicate daily, and she often mentions that she “wants me in her life,” but has no interest in cohabiting.
I’m a skilled renovator and continue to perform jobs for her at her request. I’ve expressed my desire for a reconciliation, but she has no interest in that, while telling me she “loves” me. I find this mixed message confusing.
Am I wasting my time holding out hope for a reconciliation? Am I being taken advantage of?
She is a psychologist with an intimate knowledge into the working mind, which only serves to add to my confusion on her stance.
– Canadian Fan
Dear Fan: I don’t see these messages as “mixed”: She wants to reconcile; she does not want you to move back in.
I hope you continue to see this as an opportunity to communicate about any future you might have as a couple, but if you are performing home repairs mainly in the hopes that she will want you to move back in with her, then come to my house!
Dear Amy: Reflecting on the terrible example offered by a middle-grade teacher who held a popularity contest which excluded three students [“Sad Colorado Mom”], when I was in middle school, on the first day our teacher “tested” us and put us into three groups: One, Two, Three. Guess what happened to the kids in Group 3?
Relentless taunting.
– Disgusted
Dear Disgusted: This letter prompted scores of readers to send in their own middle school memories. Few of them are good ones.
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(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)
©2021 Amy Dickinson. Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.
