Ask Amy: Toxic daughter poses danger to family
Dear Amy: My daughter is toxic. She and her husband live with me, but with my help of a hefty down payment they will soon be moving out.
I am looking forward to their absence. I am thinking of changing the locks once they leave.
My abrasive daughter tends to get angry and then cut out whomever she thinks offended her.
The list is long and includes her only brother, my sister, a nephew, my brother, his only daughter, many of my friends and their spouses, many of her own friends, her husband's family, and all of his old friends.
My elderly mother (94) and myself, at least some of the time, get caught in the crossfire, and then she will stop speaking to us for weeks at a time.
Recently, however, her angry behavior escalated. She knocked me to the floor. Although I wasn't injured, I was shocked.
I believe she needs therapy to deal with her out-sized anger. I spoke to her about it. Not surprisingly, it turned into an argument.
Of course, I was wrong to poke an alligator with unsolicited advice, but I am her mother and I do care about her.
Her husband is a nice person, but he is cowed by her furious temper.
When my daughter takes offense, she inflates the issue to gargantuan proportions, adds it to a litany of former insults, and believes she is the victim. She does not tolerate any disagreements (no matter how small) and when she argues she tears her opponent to shreds with every imaginable insult.