Ask Amy: Husband’s heart is no longer in it
— Self-Helpless
Dear Helpless: If your self-actualized and evangelizing friend feels so strongly about everyone around her “speaking their truth,” then this dictum applies to you, too.
I’m not saying this would be an easy conversation, but it is necessary for friends to tell one another the truth. This is both the burden and the joy of friendship.
Start your conversation with this phrase: “Can I offer you some feedback?”
Wait for her response.
Use “I statements”: “I feel like you’ve stopped listening to me because you are so focused on providing guidance. Right now — I need a friend, not a life coach.”
Dear Amy: “A Fan, Not an Alum in Chicago” wondered about wearing T-shirts from colleges they had not attended.
The late, great comedian Mitch Hedberg told a joke about doing college shows and always buying a T-shirt at the college bookstore: “While walking down the street one day someone shouted at me, ‘Hey, Wash U, did you go there?’ I shouted back ‘Yes, it was a Wednesday!’”
— Comedy Fan
Dear Fan: Another Hedberg gag: “I’m against picketing, but I don’t know how to show it.”
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(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)
©2021 Amy Dickinson. Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.
