Ask Amy: Marrying couple may have to dis-invite guests
Dear Worn Out: Yes, I would definitely suggest counseling to “regain that spark.” I’m talking, of course, about you and your spark. Your husband is responsible for his own spark.
Most therapists are now offering virtual counseling, and it might be very helpful for you to describe your situation to a counselor who could review some strategies for coping, and also coach you through your options. The American Psychological Association offers a “therapist locator.” Check locator.apa.org.
There is no question that the pandemic – and the uncertainty and stress – is taxing many relationships, especially those that were already strained. If it is medically safe for both of you, you might suggest a “trial separation,” whereby your husband returns to his building project and you both contemplate the reality of making the separation permanent. Bliss might follow.
Dear Amy: Following up on “Living the New Normal,” with questions about interviewing for a job remotely, I won my current job through two Zoom interviews.
A few things to consider:
Organize your notes so you're not shuffling them to find your point. I like 4-by-6 index cards.
Dress like you're interviewing in person.
If Zoom, put together your setup and Zoom someone in advance to tweak the lighting, where the computer is, and your general appearance.
I'm 65, so don't tell yourself you can't do this.
Be positive and present yourself with the best tool in your arsenal -- you!
Jane
Dear Jane: You’re my hero!
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(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)
