ArcaMax

Your less-sensitive older sister feels comfortable staking her claim and then defending it when you offer your own views. You interpret this as “tension,” but she seems to see it as a back-and-forth. She may also enjoy needling you regarding your sensitivity.

I suspect that after two weeks of being disconnected on social media, your blood pressure will stay down, you will stop feeling guilty and you will enjoy not being reactive and triggered by your sister’s postings.

The next time she teases you about living in a fantasy world, I suggest you demonstrate that you are unruffled. Send her a GIF of a unicorn leaping over a rainbow with the statement: “Life in my fantasy world is even better than I imagined. Love you, sis — let’s talk soon.”

Dear Amy: I feel betrayed by a friend of 20 years. We live close by, but rarely get together because she spends almost all her time with her husband. They don’t entertain or get together with friends or family. I don’t know why that is, but it is obviously a very personal decision and not my business.

Every day, “Jane” and I emailed back and forth several times a day, discussing every imaginable subject, including some extremely personal things. I have told her things that I have never told anyone else.

I recently joined a senior dating website. Every so often, I would share some emails men had sent me, and she would write back her comments. This has been fun.

Last week she wrote to ask me to stop sharing any dating-related emails. She said that when her husband reads those messages, he misunderstands that they are to me and not to her, and he freaks out. (Jane is in her 70s and her husband is in his 80s.)

I feel devastated to know that her husband has been reading our emails for 20 years and I did not know it.

I am reminded of an old saying: “The saddest thing about betrayal is that it never comes from your enemies.”

How can I get over this?

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