Ask Amy: Son Zooms in with a zinger
Dear Mom: You and your son seem to be playing a game of sorts. He tells you that he is gay, and your eventual reaction is that you only want him to be happy with a partner of "whatever gender."
Mom - I have news for you: he has chosen his gender, and it's not "whatever."
He then introduces you to lovely "Adam" via Zoom and immediately broadsides you with perplexing health news.
You quickly leap to the remote improbability that these two will have children and that Adam will infect their children. Whoa!
I've got a pro-tip that will make your life much easier. If you don't know what to say or how to react to any given situation - respond only in generalities: "Oh, I see." "Wow - that caught me off-guard. I don't really know what to say."
Give yourself time to process things, even if you feel pushed to react.
This is NOT the 1980s. You can read more about HIV, treatments and risks on the CDC website: CDC.gov/hiv/basics.
With antiretroviral therapy, people with HIV can reduce the viral load enough that it is considered to be undetectable. That is a life-saving medical advance.
You should ask your son (as carefully as possible) about his own health -- this might be his way of trying to tell you that he also has HIV.
Dear Amy: My oldest sister (83) has talked about her first love ("Fred"). They dated for over a year when she was 20, but he broke up with her.
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