Life Advice



Family man seeks same

By Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: I'm a 36-year-old gay man. I have always had an interest in starting a family.

I have a good career, which could be part of why I've been single for roughly 10 years now.

The issue that I run into is that I struggle to find a "peer" to date.

In the past (and recently) I've dated professionals five to 20 years older than I, but I know that people in that age group are unlikely to want a family, and there is an imbalance (from my perspective) in the dynamic.

On the flip side, I have dated those five to 10 years younger than myself, and the connection can seem just as great as those on the older side, but inevitably, they are still starting out, dealing with their own struggles as they find their way.

Ideally, it would be great to meet someone who is at a similar place in their life as I am with mine, but I wonder, at this age in my life and given the length of time I've been single, am I asking too much?


What do you think?

-- Professional and Single in Portland

Dear Single: You are not asking too much from your dating life. You are asking the exact right amount.

First of all, you shouldn't necessarily make assumptions about people based solely on their age. Although I agree that age has an impact on a person's readiness to have children, being family oriented is more of a core value.


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