Grief and confusion upset homesick student
There seem to be two ways of looking at this.
1: I get $50,000, then we split $150,000 three ways, giving me $100,000, and they each get $50,000.
2: We split $200,000 three ways, giving me $66,667, plus $50,000, giving me $116,667. And they would get about $42,165 each.
None of us live in poverty, so I just want my fair share.
So what do you say, Amy? Should I inherit $100,000, or $116,000?
-- Fair Math
Dear Fair Math: There are legal rules for how to dispatch debts from an inheritance, including in what order the debts should be paid. You should run this past an attorney, who would advise all of you on the legal and tax implications of receiving your inheritance, versus receiving a debt repayment.
My own opinion is that your mother's $50,000 debt should be paid directly to you from the overall inheritance, leaving $150,000 for you and your siblings to split equally.
Dear Amy: Thank you for your affirmative advice to "Non-communicative Sister," whose family members would force her to talk to the brother who had sexually abused her as a child.
This exact dynamic happened in my family. My being cordial with my abuser only helped my family to deny and forget what he had done to me, but I will never forget.
-- Survivor
Dear Survivor: Every survivor deserves better than this.
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)
