Survivor's family forces contact with her abuser
-- Non-communicative Sister
Dear Non: You mention your brother's sexual crimes against you as if he cheated at Monopoly -- everybody in the family knows it, but it happened a long time ago, and they can't understand why you don't like the guy.
Why are you and other family members protecting him?
You are the abuse survivor. You get to choose how best you can cope with this. But you somehow assume that your brother won't do the same thing to his lovely children that he did to his (presumably equally lovely) sister.
Your family members are complicit in covering this up. At the very least, don't help them disrespect you.
Tell them: "Never, under any circumstances, should you ever expect, coerce, or force me to talk to my brother. Why? Because he sexually abused me and I want no contact."
You should practice ways you might deal with forced (or coerced) contact.
I suggest this: The phone is handed to you. You wordlessly press "end," (or hang up) and hand the phone back to the person who handed it to you.
Please contact RAINN.org to connect with a counselor so you can talk through some of these feelings and frustrations.
Dear Amy: After being married to a narcissist for 21 years, I have been divorced for four years.
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