House full of roommates can't keep it clean
-- Awake and Pacing
Dear Awake: "Taking it inside" might be best for you, but not necessarily for them. If this husband is drunk, belligerent and (sometimes) physically violent, forcing this couple into home confinement might not be best for either of them.
You've been neighborly; you've also contacted them discreetly. Calling the police is the appropriate thing for you to do at this point. If at some point the wife is ready to leave, or needs a restraining order, a history of police visits might help her to build a case. Being threatened with arrest for public intoxication might force him toward getting help.
Dear Amy: "Hurt and Sincere" wrote about being at the stage of life where many of the parents are ill and dying.
I'm at that stage, too. Thank you for writing this: "...showing up as a witness to someone else's loss is a vital expression of our own humanity."
I wish more people understood how important this is.
-- Been There
Dear Been There: I agree.
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: Askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)
