Family member shuns mixed-faith wedding
-- Distressed Daughter
Dear Distressed: I think your problem with your mother runs deeper than her relationship with "Maxine." You obviously believe that she has squandered her own earnings; I assume you are worried about her financial future.
Your mother's relationship with her friend is her own business. Prosperous friends are sometimes quite happy to pick up the check with no hard feelings, financial reciprocation or strings attached.
If you are worried that your mom will turn to you as her own personal ATM post-retirement, then this is an important issue, and in this case, your mother's choices become your business. If you want to weigh in on her business, this should be your focus. Maxine might not be there forever.
Dear Amy: "Confused in Colorado" was griping about his lady-friend's babysitting commitments for her kids interfering with their time together as a couple.
He never said that his friend didn't want to do this, only that he thought her daughters were taking advantage of her.
I'm glad you pointed out that she had basically taken a job and that he should find useful ways to use his time. He sounded selfish.
-- Active Gran
Dear Gran: I believe that the last-minute nature of some of these commitments was getting under "Colorado's" skin. Yes, his friend has basically left retirement to work. The two of them should develop a more predictable schedule.
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)
