Stepdaughter wants a room with a view
This girl is not doing badly in school because of her room, but because she has bounced around between a mother who (I guess) doesn't want her and a stepmother who resents her presence. You should patiently ignore all room-related complaints, the way parents have been ignoring their teens' complaints since the dawn of time. All the same, I don't know why a 16-year-old needs her own car. If you are going to hold it over her head, perhaps you should take it away.
You have been hit between the eyes with a huge life change, but that's the way things go when you're in a family. Stuff happens, and the adults have to deal with it.
You and your husband need to figure out how to co-parent your stepdaughter. He should not validate her complaints, and his ex-wife's opinions should have no traction in your household. If you undermine one another, this teenager will fall through the cracks.
Dear Amy: About three years ago I found out that my wife of five years was having affairs with multiple men.
I was crushed, and we got divorced.
About a year ago I ran into her twin sister during a work event, and we began dating.
We love each other very much, but now my ex-wife has threatened to sever all ties with her sister and turn the family against her if our relationship continues.
I never told my ex-wife's family about her cheating because I didn't want to embarrass her. Should I tell the truth, or just move on?
-- SOS
Dear SOS: It seems to me that if your ex-wife really has the power to banish her own twin from the family, she also has the power to yell, "Fake news!" regarding any story you'd care to tell. You and your new love should do what you want, while understanding that you might not be able to control the story -- or the consequences.
Dear Amy: "Worried Sister" was wondering about including her brother, a sex offender, in their family holiday.
I am in law enforcement. She should listen to her instincts!
Also, she should check with his probation officer. There might be restrictions regarding whom he could be around. Ages, women, children, etc. Most importantly, one needs to listen to their "little voice."
-- Deputy Sheriff
Dear Deputy: Our instincts are sometimes smarter than we are. Thank you.
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Amy Dickinson, c/o Tribune Content Agency, 16650 Westgrove Drive, Suite 175, Addison, Texas, 75001. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)
