Family gatherings don't tempt one sibling
These almost-attendants have not spent hundreds of dollars on outfits, showers and parties. Their wallets, friendships, and sanity are intact on the wedding day.
Send your far-flung friend an invitation. If he asks (or if you feel compelled to explain), you can say, "You're living so far away, I'm going to give you a break and not ask you to be a groomsman. We would be honored if you could make it to the wedding. I can't imagine getting married without you there."
It would be thoughtful for you to include him as an honored guest, inviting him (and his date) to the rehearsal dinner and any friends-and-family brunches the day after.
Dear Amy: I am glad you strongly cautioned "Worried" to "lock down" her social media, after her sister connected with Worried's abusive ex on Facebook.
I wonder if you went far enough. Worried should probably "unfriend" her sister, to remove this online connection altogether.
-- Been There
Dear Been There: Even when people believe their social media is completely private, there are loopholes and workarounds. I think you're right.
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Amy Dickinson, c/o Tribune Content Agency, LLC., 16650 Westgrove Dr., Suite 175, Addison, TX 75001. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)
