Engagement puts strain on in-law relationship
Lately she has had a lot of health issues and she seems to be miserable all the time.
I have tried to take care of her as best I can, and she always tells me how much she loves me, but I can't remember the last time we had an intimate moment. We are both in our 60s.
I feel like I have lost my best friend and the love of my life. I just don't know what to do.
-- Perplexed
Dear Perplexed: You and your wife need to learn how to talk to each other.
Your impulse to leave without explanation only deepens the chasm between you. If you're going to leave, you should tell her exactly how you feel before you go.
Instead of asking your wife, "What's wrong" and taking "Nothing" as her answer, you should tell her how her behavior and attitude affects you.
Say, "You seem very unhappy, grouchy and angry lately. It makes me feel like I've done something wrong. I don't want to have such an angry marriage. Can we get back on track?" You should remind her that you are on her side.
She may tell you that when she doesn't feel well, she would rather not interact at all, but it is her responsibility to use her words.
Once you two start talking about your feelings, you should also talk about your sexual intimacy. Don't take your very long relationship for granted, and make a commitment to confront and work through your problems, even if it creates some uncomfortable moments for both of you.
Dear Amy: I appreciate your thoughtful replies to people inquiring about being godparents.
However, it is important to stress that a godparent, while an important symbolic title, is very different from being named a guardian, which is a legal designation.
-- Family Lawyer
Dear Lawyer: These two terms are sometimes used interchangeably, but yes, they are very different.
========
(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Amy Dickinson, c/o Tribune Content Agency, LLC., 16650 Westgrove Dr., Suite 175, Addison, TX 75001. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)
