Adult daughter wants birth parents to re-adopt her
-- Embarrassed
Dear Embarrassed: You are not responsible for your husband's rudeness. You ARE responsible for your own rudeness. And so -- the very first thing you should do is to make a more concerted effort not to interrupt people. It is a very tough habit to break, but tackling this will make you a better listener, and will change the dynamic in many of your relationships.
The next time you are aware that you are interrupting him, you should put your hand on his arm, make eye contact, and say, "I'm sorry for interrupting; I realize you didn't finish your thought." This is meant to model respectful behavior, which your husband needs to adopt.
When you two discuss this issue, you should let him know that he is not Archie Bunker, and you are not Edith. Nobody needs to be told to "stifle." When he embarrasses you, he really embarrasses himself.
"Honey, you're interrupting," or "Hang on and let me finish what I was saying" are sufficient corrections.
Dear Amy: "Concerned Mom" described her challenging relationship with her daughter. Both mother and daughter are bipolar.
I learned a lot and was helped by the good people at NAMI -- the National Alliance on Mental Illness. I found a local support group, and now I don't feel so alone.
-- Been There
Dear Been There: I applaud the work of NAMI.org in advocating for people with mental illness. They have launched an app called NAMI Air, which is a social network to help people connect with one another.
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Amy Dickinson, c/o Tribune Content Agency, LLC., 16650 Westgrove Dr., Suite 175, Addison, TX 75001. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)
