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To My Laundry Chair: I Couldn't Have Done It Without You

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For years, we had a lovely furniture showpiece in the bedroom. The microfiber chair from Crate and Barrel was royal blue, plush, with matching throw pillows. And for years, we did not set eyes on this chair, let alone sit in it.

Why? You know why. It was the Laundry Chair. Maybe you pretend not to have one. Perhaps you shove the laundry into a closet moments before company arrives, and then show off your elegant sitting area like it's a Victorian fainting room for recovering from boned corsets.

But you know the grisly truth. Other versions of Laundry Chair include Laundry Window Seat; Laundry Ottoman; Laundry Secretary Desk; Laundry Treadmill/Peloton; and Laundry Basket So Full It Has Become A Flat Surface For More Laundry.

Laundry Chair blends into the scenery, melting into an amorphous blob between the wall and the floor. Once the room absorbs the soul of Laundry Chair, like a haunted Ikea, Laundry Chair becomes immutable. Occasionally, it catches your eye. You think, "If I get murdered and the crime scene photos end up on '48 Hours Investigates,' this laundry situation is going to be so embarrassing."

Our showdown with Laundry Chair came suddenly. We got a new bedroom set and decided to reconfigure the space. After moving everything, the room still felt cramped and chaotic. The conversation between my husband and I went something like:

"I feel like there should be more room in here."

 

I eye Laundry Chair.

"Yeah, weird."

He eyes Laundry Chair.

"Maybe ... we should ..."

...continued

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