Funny Quotes

on Mar 13, 2026

Published in Jokes

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"War of The Worlds" is continuing to do huge business. You know the H.G. Wells classic where the earth is invaded by aliens and they can't be stopped. They went from city to city vaporizing everything in their path. And California still voted to give them driver's licenses." --Jay Leno

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"President Bush had a minor bike accident recently. The White House physician said he should be fine and back on his Big Wheel in no time." --Conan O'Brien

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"Do you know about this? (Recently) in Scotland, President Bush was riding his bicycle when he collided with a police officer. Personally, I blame the police officer. He should have heard Bush coming with all those baseball cards in his spokes." --Jay Leno