Headlines from 2040
Published in Jokes
-- Baby conceived naturally.... Scientists stumped.
-- Authentic year 2000 "chad" sells at Sotheby's for $4.6 million.
-- Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
-- George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
-- Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $7.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesday only.
-- 35 year study: diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.
-- Upcoming NFL draft likely to focus on use of mutants.
-- Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.
-- Microsoft announces it has perfected its newest version of Windows so it crashes BEFORE installation is completed.
-- New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters, and rolled up newspapers must be registered by January 2041.
-- Congress authorizes direct deposit of illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.
-- IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75%
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