Ol' Doc McTavish
Published in Jokes
Ol' Doc McTavish had a slow schedule, and a hankering to go golfing. But by the time he decided to go, his office assistant, Seamus, had already booked three appointments -- right in the middle of the day. Doc McTavish came up with a plan.
"Seamus," he said, "I can't cancel the appointments, so I want you to see the three patients."
"Yes, sir!" the always obedient Seamus replied.
The doctor has a great round of golf, and then rushes back to the office to see how things went.
"How did things go?" the anxious medic asks his assistant.
"The first patient had a headache, so I gave him Tylenol."
"Bravo, and the second one?" asks the doctor.
"The second one had stomach burning and I gave him Maalox, sir," says Seamus.
"Excellent! You're good at this! And what about the third one?" he asks.
"Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door opened and a beautiful young woman burst through. Like a flame, she undressed herself, taking off everything, and she lay down on the table. She spread her legs and shouted: 'HELP ME! For five years I have not seen any man!'"
"Fierce, Seamus!" said the astounded doctor. "What did ye do for that one?"
"I gave her eye drops!"
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