Politics, Moderate



Do you suffer from tipping fatigue?

Danny Tyree on

Restaurants feel justified in assessing an automatic 18-percent tip for large parties because the diners might (!) be unreasonable, might (!) tie up the table too long and might (!) forget whose turn it was to tip. Next, they will add a surcharge for bribing Animal Control because monkeys might (!) fly out of the butts of the diners.

Consumers are especially riled up over self-checkout (!) touchscreens that suggest a range of tips. (“Think of it as a convenience, not a guilt trip – although the touchscreen does sometimes complain that you never visit your cousin in Topeka.”)

The business owner swears he’s going to divvy up the money with all the (unseen) employees; but if I can’t trust him to keep the bathroom clean, fix the potholes in the parking lot and keep tea urns full, I’m not getting my hopes up about redistribution of wealth.

Tipping has taken on theological implications. In Bible days, some people had the notion that Saint Peter’s shadow falling on them would cure their illness. Now gas station clerks insist, “Hey, I was in the same time zone as your bagel, so that should be good for a buck or two.”

Hang in there, inflation-battered consumers. If Aunt Marie was here, she would feel your pain.


Or … you could feel your own dadgum pain and tip 30 percent for the privilege.


Copyright 2023 Danny Tyree, distributed by Cagle Cartoons newspaper syndicate.

Danny Tyree welcomes email responses at tyreetyrades@aol.com and visits to his Facebook fan page “Tyree’s Tyrades.”

Copyright 2023 Danny Tyree, All Rights Reserved. Credit: Cagle.com




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