Sexual Notes From the Debate Team
Like high school itself, high school sports are the unimportant masquerading as the hugely significant.
Every time an adult told high school me that "these are the best years of your life," I used to pray the guy was wrong.
He was.
And I liked high school. My parents got along. We lived indoors. I usually had a girlfriend.
But, bedazzled by the thought of our own youth, and bored by our middle age, we continue to thrust upon our children everything from overdone proms to the notion that anything you do on the football team is important. Once we're no longer in high school, we continue the fascination with games.
Last week, I wrote about the numerous broflakes whose jockstraps are chafing because a female pop singer shows up at professional football games.
Hey, at least Taylor Swift isn't PLAYING in the Super Bowl, although she could if she announced that she was, in fact, a man. She's a little light, it's true, but she's fast and she moves well.
And it happens.
Out there in the 'burbs, Shane, a senior at Bookban High School, announces that he is not Shane but is, in fact, Shayla. Having laid claim to his girlhood, Shane/Shayla buys a bathing suit with a top half, joins the girls' swim team, and begins merrily out-swimming every Meghan and Alicia in the tri-county area.
Hilarity does not ensue.
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