What happened to 'Menver'? Denver daters say finding love is getting harder

Since his divorce, he’s spent the last three years reorienting himself among Denver singles. The Midwesterner largely spent his early bachelor years in Atlanta — “completely awesome for a gay 20-year-old,” he said in a phone interview. But Howard has realized that, today, “our social interactions are different than they were 20-plus years ago.”

When he goes out on the town, he’s typically surrounded by younger individuals, many of whom are preoccupied with their phones. “Just making friends can be challenging,” Howard said. “Most of my friends in my social circle are married people, raising children.”

On the apps, he’s learned about relationship practices that were previously unfamiliar to him, like polyamory, which is growing more mainstream in 2024. “If two people can navigate those approaches in healthy ways, then fine, that’s great,” Howard said. “I just don’t know if it’s for me.”

Still, the self-proclaimed optimist believes “there’s got to be at least one person out there for me.”

‘When the timing is right’

“I bet it would be really great to be in Denver and be a single gal here,” Elissa Jane Mastel, 54, recalls thinking when she resettled here as an empty-nester four years ago.

After taking time to heal from her last relationship, she joined the apps, but ran into scams and fake accounts. Mastel has also had to fend off younger guys who only seek her out for her age. Now, she’s taking a break.

Among Colorado men, Mastel’s encountered “a level of extreme.” She describes them as “so hooked on the adrenaline life that they’re not touching down to make some time for connection.”

Mastel, who identifies as pansexual, has also “definitely struggled to meet women here,” too — an easier task in her home state of New York.

“People come here to reinvent themselves, and maybe reinventing themselves doesn’t include having a committed partner,” she said in a phone interview.

Mastel enjoys hiking and camping, so she’s looking for an age-appropriate life partner to remain active with her. For now, she’s leaning on her strategy of passing out her business card to potential matches at concerts and ski resorts. One tip: Mastel has met attractive men in the lemonade aisle of Whole Foods Market at 1701 Wewatta St.

At the end of the day, she remains positive. “It is possible to meet someone when the timing is right. It doesn’t matter if you’re in Denver or outer space.”