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Ask Amy: Mother wants another baby despite family’s wishes

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

My understanding is that the chance of producing viable eggs at her age is extremely low. And would your father be expected to contribute his DNA to this process? If so, he has opportunities to refuse to do so. He should consider having a vasectomy to guarantee that he will not father more children.

Your mother has the right to make choices about her own body, but no – she does not have the right to bring a baby into the family against your father’s wishes. (However, to address your hypothetical, in my opinion, 12-year-olds do tend to love their parents, regardless of how old their folks are.)

Therapy is the ideal place for your parents to discuss this challenging issue.

Gauging this issue only on the basis of “allocation of resources” is selfish (for lack of a different word), but this perspective reveals that – academically advanced as you are – you are still a teenager, with a teenager’s tendency to put your own interests at the forefront. This is an appropriate perspective for you to have, but it is not one you should automatically expect the rest of the family to share.

Additionally, your parents do not owe you tuition for a private college. You should do some research to identify ways to lower the cost of your post-secondary education – through academic scholarships and/or challenging but less expensive schools.

Dear Amy: I am 15 years old and recently got my first boyfriend.

 

He’s really nice. Our parents know and like each other. I really feel comfortable around him. We go to the same school and have a lot of the same friends.

Last week we were hanging around with some friends before our last period class started. We were all joking around, and my boyfriend started making fun of the skirt I was wearing. It wasn’t too short or anything. It is just a skirt.

Anyway, during this time, he called me a “slut” and started laughing. I guess he was trying to say he thought my skirt was too short.

I was laughing, too, but later on I felt really hurt by this. After school I texted him that this hurt my feelings and he replied that he was just goofing around and it was a joke.

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