Ask Amy: Bargains find him, but joy is fleeting

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on Apr 11, 2023

It was fun rereading many of these, but at this point in my life I don't feel the need to keep them.

Instead of throwing them away, I decided that the sender might enjoy reading what they had written decades earlier, so I bundled packets of their individual letters off with notes to the effect: "Cleaning house! Here's a blast from your past! Enjoy!"

Now months later, I have not heard back from one person.

I'm questioning whether I did something wrong.

I know that I would enjoy reading letters I wrote many years ago, but maybe that's just me.

Should I have just destroyed these old letters, instead?

– Cleaning in Culver City

Dear Cleaning: This was an extremely thoughtful thing to do. I can imagine that this gesture might have brought up a lot of feelings for the recipients, and I wonder, now that letter-writing seems to be on the decline, how future generations will chronicle their lives and long friendships.

I can’t imagine why people didn’t contact you to acknowledge this effort; I hope you will follow up to ask if they had reread their letters and enjoyed them as much as you had. Their responses might reveal some complicated emotions.

Dear Amy: The newlywed “Daughter-in-law in Training” needs to stand her ground with her mother-in-law; politely (as you said), but firmly – even if she does not have her husband’s full support.

Sometimes men cannot say no to their mothers, even when they want to.

– Been There

Dear Been There: I’ve noticed this phenomenon. Thank you for pointing it out.

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(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)