ArcaMax

Now – here’s the tough part: Your emotions notwithstanding, this is a scenario where there is an inevitable loser – and that is you. It is ethically and morally wrong to pursue the married father of the children you are caring for. (It is just as wrong for him to pursue you, too – but this is about you.)

There are times when your feelings and impulses should not rule your behavior, such as committing an act of violence when you’re angry, abandoning a dependent when you’re bored, or stealing money to fulfill a material passion. This is another one of those times.

Now – give yourself a “Cher slap,” and … “Snap out of it!” I’m going to proclaim this man an important transitional romantic object at a time when you are extremely emotionally vulnerable.

You should not remain in this household. Get another position. Within two weeks of leaving, your ardor will die down, you will start to realize how close you flew to the flame, and you will be justifiably proud that you did the right thing – or rather, that you did not do the wrong thing.

Dear Amy: I have been separated from my spouse for four months and am slowly moving through the divorce process.

As this could take a while, I am wondering if it’s appropriate to join an online dating app as a “separated” man? How might this be viewed by women who might want to date me?

Or should I just wait till my divorce is finalized?

– On the Sidelines

Dear On the Sidelines: Some women will not care about your marital status because they might not be interested in a longer-term relationship.

Anyone can state that they are separated, and someone looking for a no-strings-fling might be attracted to someone they perceive as unavailable.

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