Life Advice



Ask Amy: Father feels undermined over FaceTime

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: I am a husband and father of an 18-month-old daughter.

I’m concerned about how my mother-in-law treats my wife and daughter.

She calls my wife multiple times a day to FaceTime with her granddaughter.

My wife answers as often as she can.

The problem I have is that my mother-in-law keeps saying things to our toddler like: "Don't worry — whenever grandma is talking to you, you don't have to listen to your mom."

Or when my wife tells my daughter to stop doing something, her mother will say, "Grandma says it's OK."


The last time I heard this I wanted to grab the phone and say: "Mom makes the rules, if you can't follow them, you can't see our daughter" and hang up on her.

My wife says that it isn't my place (I agree) but she hasn't set boundaries, yet.

My MIL is coming to visit in about a week and I've been stressing about it constantly.

She is sleeping on our couch for three days, and I don't think I want to hold my tongue if she tries to say the same things when she is in our home.


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