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Ask Amy: DNA discoveries bring forward tough truths

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: My husband and I recently had our DNA tested.

We knew people can uncover unexpected relationships, but I wish we had thought about how to cope with this before we took our tests.

Amy, both of us have discovered that we have half-siblings.

My father had two children with another woman while I was in junior high.

My husband's father had a child with a close family friend while his mother was pregnant with him.

Both of us are trying to understand this without the ability to ask our fathers (deceased), and without any deep understanding of what was happening at the time.

 

The last thing we want to do is ask our mothers, who are quite elderly.

Please caution your readers to consider, before submitting their DNA, what their own feelings and actions will be if they find out something shocking.

My husband and I agree that we are glad we know, but it has been difficult — particularly because all of these half-siblings really don't want to meet or know us.

My question to you is — should we tell our siblings? They may want to know, but we are not sure.

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