Ask Amy: A neighbor's visit rattles a relative
-- Canceled Cousin
Dear Cousin: Your most important obligation is to your own mental health and well-being. Your relationship with your cousin is imbalanced. Steering clear of her and focusing on your own personal growth would be best for you. You should also pursue therapy, which is the ideal place to explore relationships, and the feelings they bring up.
You should stay in touch with your aunt, and if visiting her brings you in proximity to your cousin, be cordial - but don't give yourself away.
Dear Amy: In a recent column, you quoted your hero, Mr. Rogers, who said, "Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping."
You're one of them. Thank you for what you do.
-- Grateful
Dear Grateful: Mr. Rogers was actually quoting his mother, who passed along this wonderful wisdom to him when he was a boy.
Many "helpers" these days take great personal risks - every day when they turn up for work. I cannot be counted among them, but thank you so much for this lovely compliment.
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(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)
