Midlife dater ignores red flag waving
-- Midlife Dater
Dear Dater: Here's a basic dating rule of thumb: If you have to ask if something is a red flag, then it IS a red flag. What's that I see? It's a "not so terrible" guy hoisting a piece of crimson colored fabric up a flagpole.
You don't like his behavior. You've told him so and have asked him to stop.
Stalkers, boundary-crossers, or obsessed lovelorn or love-struck people often believe they are being chivalrous. But there is nothing chivalrous about disrespecting someone's stated wishes. True chivalry involves being willing to sacrifice your own wishes and desires for someone else's sake.
This man is of an older generation, and he may not fully understand how annoying it can be to receive unwanted texts, but telling a woman that you love her after she has asked you to back off is not a Hallmark movie; it's a Lifetime movie.
Meanwhile, there's a perfectly nice guy close to your age who is respecting your wishes. Hmmm. It's your call.
Dear Amy: I am a 66-year-old man -- recently remarried.
My wife has three grown daughters, ages 33, 31, and 29 (none are married).
She has a codependent relationship with all three daughters.
They know how to manipulate her, and she seems to need to allow it. This has put a tremendous strain on our marriage.
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